This is going to sound really melodramatic, but most days I can't figure out why I survived that pulmonary embolism. I just feel like there hasn't been a point to my life since then and nothing particularly good has come out of it. Nothing has really made sense since before that time. I feel like my life would have been such a good story if it had ended there, but now it's dragging on. Like a tv show that shouldn't have been renewed for another season.